New (Old) Computer, Summer Camp

Earlier this week, I got a new (new to me), used computer from a friend of mine. That day he also gave me my first real taste of Linux. Still have a LOT of kinks to work out and a lot to learn, but lets just say that I really, really hope we can get this computer, my mom's Windows computer, hooked up ASAP after we move next month.

Aside from that, nothing major has happened lately. I've been watching anime at home all week, role-playing with my friends online when they're on, and composing this blog. Nothing really deep or intelligent like my last post, but I really am trying to keep it easy for now, considering that I have summer camp next week and it'll be my last year. Hopefully, we'll go again this year to an arcade-like hangout that we've been doing every year, and then I can show off my DDR skillz and prove to the bunkmates that I actually have some dexterity in this bulk I carry around.

Pagan Group, Evaluating Religion

Lately, I've had a lot of doubts about how my future will be, and not just because I'm starting college in August. My doubts lie in the college pagan group I spoke of in an earlier post that I want to join. Not to plant the seeds of self-conversion, mind you, (though it is always a possiblity), but to get a realistic, undoctored view of how pagan followers are, and I have a strong notion that they're like every other living, breathing human being. My doubt, most of all, lies in how others close to me might view this habit.

I had revealed to my mom at a senior party several weeks ago that I wanted to be with this group. She believes, has doubts, that this is one of those "anti-Christian" groups that "brainwash college students." Well, "Anti-Christian" would signifiy one is not Christian, but of another faith. Some of them might not agree with Christian beliefs, but if they can have tolerance for other peoples' beliefs, that is fine with me. The "brainwash college students" part, I believe, stems from two possibilities, that she 1) was, like many Christian followers, taught of such "demon-worshipping" groups such as Wiccans and Witches, and/or 2) she still remembers all the cyanide kool-aid cults from back when. If I can maybe show to her that pagans are just the same as the next group of people, I can ease her into becoming more understanding, and tolerable, of them. She did say I could hang with them, but not get involved with them.

Lately, though, I've been getting all philosopical about where my beliefs stand. The fact that I have some doubts still about being with pagans out of the scare tactic taught in my religion that these groups may, even unconsciously, worship the devil, has made me reevalulate and observe in the deepest manner my stance. For example, the deities of God and the devil are recognized mainly in the Judeo-Christian religions, but that is about it. If one does not believe in such deities, as in some pagan religions, how can one worship the devil? Of course, it's not uncommon to hear from some evangalists that they are worshipping the devil unconsciously. We could believe that, but then that would mean that God and the devil are "true" figures, are "the" figures and they are the only omnipotent figures in spirital existance. For that to be "true", everyone would have to believe in them. Religions are powerful enough to shape one's life extensively, but they're ideas and beliefs that some people strongly believe in. Its these contradictions between beliefs that continues to make me more unsure of my future.

If I hear one more complant about me not posting, I will... just sit here

So far, the summer has been relatively uneventful. There has to be something that gives me a big kick to post about it, but I guess I'll sweat the small stuff while I'm at it too. I attended a open house held by my ALPHA teacher yesterday and talked with some friends. I viewed the apartment I'll be living in for the next four years and it isn't too bad a size. The toughest part, though, aside from getting everything packed to move, is deciding on a minor at Iowa (which is how I'll refer to the University of Iowa from now on). While I realize I will take many, many courses to complete my major, I have a good feeling that not all the credits I need to take in my undergrad will come from my major. The problem stems from that there are many minors to choose from that I'm interested in, but also carry their own pros and cons.

American Indian and Native Studies
Pros: Something I'm strongly interested in; some courses pertain to general education requirements; Iowa has strong relations to native peoples.
Cons: Umm... I'll get back to you on that.

Religious Studies
Pros: Something I'm slightly interested in; some courses pertain to GE requirements.
Cons: .... my people will call your people.

Philosophy
Pros: Really allow me to stretch my reasoning
Cons: I'm not sure if my mind can handle the elasticity in such thinking.

So it's at a three-way tie, but I believe the American Indian minor will prevail because I've been interested in that longer than the other two. But we shall see. only 3 days to orientation.